NGAMER #35 – Wii Review – Don King Boxing

(NB. There are no screenshots for this review as Geraint broke the screen grab machine thingy)

DON KING BOXING – REVIEW
Don’t hail to the King, baby…

There was once a time when Don King was a major force in the world of boxing. As such, 2K have roped in the great man and have attached his moniker to their latest big-gloved games. But his magic touch has failed here – Don King’s Boxing is a lightweight, getting floored in the first round and swallowing its teeth.

Your view is in-body like Wii Sports, with a similar control scheme. Thrusting forward jabs, swiping releases a hook and jerking upwards releases an uppercut. Holding B releases a body blow and A raises your defences, letting you duck and weave with a waggle. Stringing combos together lights up a bolt by the adrenaline meter which, when holding C, releases a powerful blow on your opponent. All trained up, into the ring we go…

Boxing stupid
…Only to find there’s little to do. In Story mode you’re given an uncustomisable character called ‘The Kid’ and shown his career through ludicrous documentary cutscenes involving Don King and pals. Big names like Joe Calzaghe will sit there telling you how they championed Kid at an early age. It’s a nice idea but it drags on so much that you end up skipping most of them due to hammy overacting.

Don King is supposed to immerse you into ‘the world of boxing’, but take away all the glitz and glamour and you’re left with a poorly presented game where you fight in empty stadiums with awful crowd sprites cheering you on. Punches sometimes won’t register but it barely matters – even if you get knocked down a few times you only have to knock down your opponent once or twice before they give up.

Exhibition offers two-player bouts with a roster of boxers, although Don’s personal stable is surprisingly empty (no Holyfield or Tyson?). Balance board support is barely worth the mention – it lets you weave during a fight but you’re better off using the standard controls. Training is better but four exercises are slight compared to Ready 2 Rumble’s full deck of modes and customization. If this were one of Don’s poorer boxers, he’d sever all ties with him. Sorry Don, but we’re going to have to do the same with your game.

IN DETAIL:

OVERVIEW:
World’s most flamboyant promoter releases licensed boxing game.

GRAPHICS: 5
Well-rounded boxers but the same care doesn’t extend to anything else in the game.

AUDIO: 7
Hip-hop soundtrack featuring RUN-DMC and even Eye of the Tiger’s in there somewhere…

GAMEPLAY: 4
No challenge variety. Flail your arms, rinse and repeat. Such a shame as the controls are better than Ready 2 Rumble…

INNOVATION: 2
Will someone give us a decent Wii boxing game, for the love of God? It can’t be that hard, can it?

NG SUMMARY: 55%
Hopes were raised with the decent control scheme. Sadly, it’s as messy and tangled as the great man’s hair.